Tag Archive for Shoulders

Non Verbal Body Language Dictionary ::O::

by Christopher Philip • March 26, 2010 • 0 Comments

Did we forget a nonverbal term? Suggest it in the comment box or e-mail it direct, and we’ll be ecstatic to add it! With well over 500 terms, the BLP dictionary is growing to be the largest free nonverbal dictionary in the world! Brought to you exclusively by The Body Language Project! Visit our homepage for more free learning.

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Oblique eyebrows of grief: In this facial expression the eyebrows are pulled upward more so than the otter ends.

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Observation: Observation in body language reading implies that one actively watches the entire disposition of a person from their head to their toes including all their verbal and paraverbal cues. There is a big disparity between just seeing something and actively evaluating what is being seen and this is what separates an average body language reader, from an expert.

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Oddball handshake: A handshake that often includes bumps, slaps, flicks and clicks. Meant to display a relaxed casual atmosphere and has its place to forming intimate friendships and bonds.

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Offensive gestures: Culturally specific gestures that produce negative feelings in others such as the middle finger in the West and the okay signal in Europe.

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Offered (the): The hands are palm up as if giving a gift. This is a beggar’s plea where agreement is desperately sought from the audience.

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Office artifacts or office props: Office artifacts include any objects that take up space in the place of work. They can be used to display status such as the use of trophies, plaques, certificates or interests such as model cars, sports memorabilia or pictures hung on walls such a nature or fishing adventures. Lawyers are usually portrayed in front of a large library of books which is a nonverbal signal of the mountain of knowledge that “backs them.”

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“OK” gesture: Done by placing the thumb against the index finger forming an opening with the remaining fingers flared out. It is considered more thought provoking and honest when compared to finger pointing because it place emphasis onto the speech rather than the listeners. In Belgium and France however, it means that something is worthless, in Tunisia, Sicily and Southern Italy is an insult, and in Japan that they wish their change returned in coins.

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Ok personality: People that are psychologically comfortable with who they are. They usually have upright posture, with shoulders firm and square, head raised and their body is balanced.

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Olfactory processing: A secondary way of processing information like visual and auditory except the primary means involves the sense of smell. It falls out of the normal realm with which people process information they receive but is occasionally referred to as a vestige. People will use terms such as the following when they refer to their olfaction: This deal stinks. Something smells wrong here. Did you get a whiff of that? This is fresh.

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Once over (the): A sexual or competitive eye pattern that follows the body over its entire form from the toes to the top of the head stopping at the buttocks, breasts and face, typically performed by men. Women are rarely caught looking men over due to their superior peripheral vision. Men have hunter eyes and focus intently on smaller areas. When it signals competitiveness it is usually done by women onto other women looking for a “cat fight.”

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Open body language or openness: Any and all body language that shows that a person is ready to communicate and accept ideas from others. It happens when no part of the body covers the midway-point of the bisected body. The arms and legs are not crossed and the palms are up. Even clothing might be relaxed such as shirt collars being unbuttoned, the pants might hang loose and certain articles like jackets might be removed. Other signals of openness includes increased proximity, prolonged eye contact, warm and relaxed smile, intimate greetings such as hugs and cheek kissing.

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Opposite body language: A pick-up technique where men play hard-to-get by displaying teasing nonverbal cues or even outright disinterest. The object of opposite body language is to appear “chase worthy” in the eyes of women by appearing to be superior to them and avoid appearing “needy.”

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Oral displacement activities: An unconscious gesture aimed at self soothing by using parts of the body such as fingers or hair, or inanimate objects like pens by mouthing them. Scientists have speculated that it is a developmental throwback when we would suckle as infants. Oral displacement can include biting finger nails, sucking pencils, mouthing the stems of the glasses or passing hair through the mouth. Smokers can also be said to have oral displacement fixation where they habitually place objects in their mouth to sooth.

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Orbicularis oculi muscles: One of two muscles that produce smiling. These muscles serve to pull the eyes back to produce the honest smile through what is called “smiling eyes”. Smiling eyes, also called “crow’s feet”, where a classic wrinkling appears in the corner of the eyes is an indication of true happiness.

Oscar Pfungst: Psychologist who uncovered that the skills under which Hans the horse was able to perform simple math had nothing to do with his intelligence, but rather his ability to read body language. He noticed that there were differences in breathing, posture and facial expressions as Hans tapped out his answer. As Hans neared to correct answer, the handlers would increase the tension they held in their body language which would tip off Hans. Once the final tap had been made, the tension suddenly disappeared from the person and so Hans took this cue to mean it was time to stop tapping.

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Orienting reflex or orienting response (a): The phenomenon whereby people turn and move toward stimuli or people they are attracted to, or agree with, rather than away from them such as those we fear or disagree with. (b) The instinctive survival instinct whereby a person orients toward movement. As it applies to nonverbal communication, the orientation reflex controls distractions in business, to maintaining the attention of children with toys, and even to the freeze response where people stop moving in order to put themselves under the radar.

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Ownership gestures: Body language that indicates that a person is in control of something. Ownership gestures are usually performed on objects, but can also be done to people. Propping the feet up on a desk or car bumper or wrapping an arm around a lover or child, are ways to show who they belong to.

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Oxytocin: A natural chemical released by the body due to touching that helps create bonding between people especially in women. In men, sex is the primary releaser of oxytocin which surges up to fives times that of normal just before reaching orgasm. Oxytocin serves to eliminate internal tensions, reduce anxiety, creates feelings of contentment, calmness and trust, and provides reassurance. The hormone is partially responsible for pacifying behaviours that include self touching.

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The Body Language Project is the result of a decade of personal research including a thorough review of over 60 primary scientific research journal articles. Learning body language forms the perfect foundation for success in ALL your communication.

If you are only picking up on what is being said, you are missing more than half of the message.

For more information on Body Language be sure to check out: BodyLanguageProject.com and the Ebook – The Body Language Guide to Dating, Attraction and Sexual Body Language.

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Non Verbal Body Language Dictionary ::N::

by Christopher Philip • March 25, 2010 • 0 Comments

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Nail biting: Nonverbal signal where the finger nails are chewed. It signals apprehension, anxiety, discomfort and a lack of self-confidence.

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Namaste: A greeting gesture common in India and Nepal. It is done by pressing the hands together palm in palm with fingers pointed upward in front of the chest. A slight bow of the head is sometimes added.

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Nasal wing dilation or nose flaring: Technical term for flared nostrils indicating that a person is entering a fight or flight response and is preparing for action by increasing oxygen uptake.

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Natural smilers: These are people that have a genuine symmetrical smile where both corners of the lips turn upwards equally. Natural smilers will have more even smiles as both sides of their brain respond to pleasure. Smiles that are not genuine are more pronounced on the left side of the face since they are consciously being controlled.

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Neck exposures: Exposures of the neck are linked to visceral responses linked to submissiveness and are displayed during courtship by women and by children.

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Neck rubbing or neck touching: The neck hold, scratch or rub is a response to negative feelings and is a restraint posture as in “holding one’s self back” as one might do to a wily cat or dog by grabbing them by the scruff of the neck only in this case, it is done to one’s self.

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Negative body language: Negative body language is any nonverbal cue meant to portray discomfort such as fear, aggression, timidity or shyness. When compared to positive body language, negative body language tends to be more honest since we routinely hide our shortcomings and are instructed to do so as children.

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Neocortex or mammalian brain: “Neo” from the root “new” is meant to describe the mammalian brain which is more complex and used for higher order thinking and planning. The neocortex is divided into four lobes, the frontal lobe which handles reasoning, speech, movement, and emotions, the parietal lobe is related to orientation, sensory information, recognition, and perception, the occipital lobe which handles vision and the temporal lobe which handles sounds and smells. These parts of the brain are active in deception and also creating false or misleading body language gestures. It is also referred to as the “lying brain.”

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Neoteny: All children are born with a small nose, round chubby cheeks, soft skin, big eyes and a big round face. We call these features neotenous as they remind us of characteristics found near birth. Neotenous features evoke protective feelings in others, even if carried by adults.

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Nervous body language or nervousness: Includes cues that results from discomfort. They include increased eye blink rate, stuttering, dilated pupils, fidgeting, appearing unfriendly or tense, facial fidgeting, shaking, postural shifts or unrelaxed/reserved postures, twitches, shrugs, head movements, playing with objects, sneering, scowling, frowning, smiling, coughing, biting the lower lip, pressing the lips together, increases in chattiness or becoming quiet, wrinkling of the nose, increase in perspiration, blushing or turning pale, curling up in a ball, shifting weight from side to side, rocking in a chair, uncrossing and recrossing the arms or legs, tapping the fingers and increased swallowing.

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Nervous energy: Extra energy that courses through the body due to various stress hormones producing telltale nonverbal behaviours. A person who is anxious will tend to fidget more often, bounce their legs up and down, pace back and forth, play with their face, scratch their arms or even shake uncontrollably. When people have nervous energy, they use movement to burn it off or displace it.

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Nervous hands: Hands that shake, quiver, or fidget indicate stress through a surge of adrenaline. Sometimes nervous hands are disguised through clasping or tucking them into pockets.

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Nervous feet or anxious feet: The polar opposite to happy feet. Nervous feet are more jarring with heel bumps, kicks, and grinding. Angry feet can be even more aggressive and stomp.

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Nervous smile: A fleeting smile that quickly shows and disappears, the eyes are tensed and darting and the lips may quiver in fear. Other times the smile is long-lasting, more than ordinary eluding to strong discomfort and withholding of information.

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Nonelective physical characteristics: One of two types of outer physical traits that a person might have from which a person might be judged (the other being elective). A nonelective trait includes a person’s height, to some degree their weight, body proportions, their complexion, facial features, physical handicaps, the colour of their hair, their age and sex, their race, and so forth. These are important cues to the nonverbalist, but not nearly as much as elective characteristics since they are not chosen. Nonelective traits influence how people are perceived by others and can therefore predict in a general sense how they have been treated by others to produce their core character, but it does not predict their underlying emotions and personality.

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Nonthreatening body language: Nonverbal communication that indicates that a person is not looking for a confrontation and one who is friendly. These include open palm displays, erect, yet relaxed body postures, relaxed gaze, smiling, comfortable proximity, among others.

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Nonverbal awareness: The relative consciousness of silent messages in ones immediate surroundings and their inherent power.

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Nonverbal communication or NVC: Behaviour including gestures, postures, eye patterns, touch, facial expression, fashion, use of space and territory and paraverbal cues that are either directly or are indirectly used to convey meaning from one person to another.

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Nonverbal empathy: Like emotional empathy which is the capability to share in another’s feelings, nonverbal empathy is the capability to share in another’s emotions by connecting to their unspoken movements. It is related to rapport building, but of which no link between two people needs to established, just pure understanding. Mother’s who focus on their preverbal children to understand their desires and wishes by monitoring eye contact, eye direction, pointing, bouncing, use of touch and various other signals will have nonverbal empathy with their children.

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Nonverbal hot spots: An area of the body where active nonverbals are being emitted which provide useful clues to a nonverbalist.

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Nonverbal intelligence: The relative knowledge of the postures and gestures and their meaning coupled with the ability to apply them in a skillful way to bring success to all facets of life including personal and work.

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Non-verbalist (the): A person who is deeply fascinated with watching the silent language occurring all around them. The non-verbalist will watch people in all functions, at nightclubs, at the park, in malls, on television, or at the office. They will consume material and scientific research to learn and build on their resource base so they can master reading, what is to ordinary people, hidden thoughts and emotions as well as to build on and improve their relationships with others.

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Nonverbal leakage: Body language signals which are emitted from a person without their conscious awareness, or at times despite their conscious awareness, which provides useful, yet otherwise hidden information to others.

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Nonverbal physical mannerisms: Ways the body can be held to convey various meanings. For example, standing over someone as they work displays aggression, whereas placing chairs at forty-five degree angles, crossing the legs toward your partner, and avoid putting the hands together shows assertiveness and control. Other mannerisms like drumming the fingers and tapping the feet show nervousness.

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Nonverbal radar: The decision to be watchful of the nonverbal communication occurring all around a person. A person might have their radar turned on to study other people or they might relax it, such as with friends and family.

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Nonverbal vetting: A process of careful observation and evaluation of a person through nonverbal channels to assess their honesty, character, motives, and usefulness.

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Nose crinkle: Happens when the muscles between the eyes just above the nose contract forcing the skin around the nose to wrinkle. It signifies dislike and disgust and can happen in fractions of a second making it very reliable.

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Nose touch: Touching the nose with the hand is a discomfort gesture linked to anxiety and so is a pacifying gesture. Other times it provides clues that a person is lying.

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Nose turning: A signal of dislike or disbelief where the nose momentary twitches to the side. It is as if a person is moving their nose away from a disagreeable smell.

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Nose up gesture: A confidence display where the chin comes up and is opposite to the head down submissive posture.

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Not OK people: People that are uncomfortable with who they are. They have shoulders hunched and carry a negative facial emotions. You may naturally feel wary when around them without reason.

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NLP: Abbreviation for Neuro-Linguistic Programming. NLP is a system developed to help induce behavioural changes and improve communication between colleagues as well as to re-train thinking in business. It was developed in the 1970s where two researches in California, Richard Bandler and John Grinder noted that the predominant research into human behaviour focused on analysis rather then retraining thinking patterns. NLP is driven by defining positive outcomes, understanding how other’s perceive particular circumstances and in identifying the roots by which thoughts affect images and sound or feelings.

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If you are only picking up on what is being said, you are missing more than half of the message.

For more information on BodyLanguage be sure to check out: BodyLanguageProject.com and the Ebook – The Body Language Guide to Dating, Attraction and Sexual Body Language.

Share and Enjoy:

Non Verbal Body Language Dictionary ::M::

by Christopher Philip • March 25, 2010 • 0 Comments

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Macroexpressions: A term that compliments microexpressions. It defines nonverbal signals that are easily seen and persist in time such as arm crosses, leg crosses, shoulder shrugs, and facial expressions so forth.

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Man hug or macho hug: Usually a single armed hug flung over the back with the other hand clasped thumb over fist sandwiched in between the chests of each hugger. Usually the fist of the free hand is clenched closed rather than open palmed, but other times it is vigorously slapped over the upper back. The shoulders are also sometimes bumped together with the hands in a thumb over hand shake as the two pull together. The man hug is a less intimate version of the embrace.

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Manipulative body language: Body language aimed specifically to sway a person into doing something that is not in their best interest or believing in something that may be harmful.

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Manipulator: A gesture that produces self-reassurance or one that performs an instrumental task such as straightening a tie which could indicate nervousness or might actually need straightening.

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Masked arm crossing or masked crossed arms: When a person holds a drink across the centerline of the body while seated or standing, hold a drink with both hands or reach across the body to play with a watch or cufflink they are said to have masked an arm cross. These are defensive-protective postures.

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Masked body language: Gestures such as crossing the arms across the body to create comfort but that are disguised as necessary, such as to adjust a watch or cufflink, straighten a tie, or other grooming function. They are said to be masked because they appear to serve a true purpose, but in actual fact, do not.

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Masking: This is a term used to describe a phenomenon by which people dehumanize themselves when in busy public places. It permits people to remove emotions and feelings, at least on the surface, to navigate an impersonal world full of strangers. In evolutionary terms, masking is like a “poker face” that hides insecurities and weakness which might have arisen on chance meetings with foreign tribes. Cussing, yelling and other carrying on is a way to mask sensitivity and to hide caring which is common in places like New York.

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Measurer (the) or measurement gestures or power palms or parallel palms: The hands are moved parallel to one another and juggled up and down as if measuring an object. This signals a desire to project thoughts onto others. A secondary meaning stems from figuratively demonstrating how big an object or idea is. For example, a fish was this big by moving the hands away from each other show just how big.

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Mehrabian, Albert: Born in 1939 Albert Mehrabian is a professor of psychology at UCLA. His nonverbal research findings have been often quoted and his 7%-38%-55% rule has received worldwide attention (and misinterpretation). It is commonly misconstrued to imply that nonverbal messages are 55% of the message, while only 7% is what is actually said, with the remaining 38% due to how it is delivered. However, in actual fact, his studies showed that 7% of liking comes from verbal channels, 38% vocal liking and 55% facial liking. For further investigation on Mehribian see his 1967 studies “Decoding of Inconsistent Communications” and “Inference of Attitudes from Nonverbal Communication in Two Channels.”

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Metronome or metronomic signals: Rhythmic movements such as tapping that indicate a readiness to speak, boredom, or though.

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Microculture: A subset of a larger culture which can be as small as two people.

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Microexpressions: Microexpressions are facial movements or expressions that flash across the face at such a fast rate that they are barely perceivable. Signals are normally used to decipher liars from those telling the truth because they are very small and difficult to control. These cues show up on high speed video cameras played back and persistence from 1/25 to 1/5 of a second. They appear as furrows, smirks, frowns, smiles and wrinkles and can offer an accurate window into emotions. The research are commonly expressed by muscles such as the fontalis, corregator and risorius and they are provoked by underlying emotions that are nearly impossible to control consciously.

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Microgestures or microsignals: A brief nonverbal cue that happens due to an attempt to suppress a normal response to a negative stimuli. Because they happens so quickly they are reliable and termed “honest gestures” according the body language reader. These signals can be quick smirks, nose crinkles, or hands that seem move to pacify only to come up short at the last second.

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Micromessaging or microsignaling: Describes the subtle form of nonverbals that occurs just over the level of consciousness, but of which is difficult to catch if not aware. These are the mild glares, scornful eyes, subtle ignoring through slightly turned shoulders, tiny eye rolling, and so forth. These signals are aimed at belittling a person without them being perfectly aware of the reason they are being rejected. Micromessaging is prevalent in the workplace as bosses and employees power play each other.

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Military man or arms behind the back posture: A posture normally held by dominant individuals and leaders. It occurs by placing the hands, palm in palm behind the back. It can also be held by policemen or the military and can be accompanied by holding the chin up and head held back. Power is the main meaning it delivers, as it exposes the full front of the body to possible attack and also says that a person is so powerful they aren’t to be touched or approached.

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Mince (the): A type of gait which is very fast, but with only short strides.

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Mind strings: A term with roots in hypnosis. Mind strings are triggers which when set or “pulled on” by a stimuli creates predictable responses in people. The analogy which best describes mind strings is that of a piano which when keys are pressed, a string is pulled creating a predictable result – a sound. The mind, through hypnosis and suggestion and daily life, works similarly such that when certain triggers are hit, a person will yield predictable responses. For example, when a person is suddenly screamed at, they react with surprise, or when presented with images of salty chips, begin to salivate. All people are collections of their past including that created through evolution and it is this framework that produces strings which can be pulled. The value of mind strings to the nonverbalist are those which can be pulled to create desirable results. For example, nearly every person has a mind string which says that stylish people are worthy of attention and those who lack style, are not. Pulling on that attractiveness string yields a halo effect. Men who study social dynamics to seduce women will frequently hit strings to pull women into their frame.

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Mirroring or isopraxis: In the simplest form, mirroring is copying the gestures, movements, muscle tension, expressions, voice tonality, breathing, tempo and eye movements of someone else. Mirroring is one of the most important aspects of building empathy with people as it establishes common ground and is akin to a communication dance. Mirroring happens naturally between people we like and with whom have formed a connection. Isopraxis from the Greek iso meaning same and praxis, meaning behaviour.

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Mirror neurons: The discovery of the mirror neuron happened by accident at the University of Parma in Italy by researchers Giacomo Rizzolatti and Vittorio Gallese in 1996. They mirror neuron are responsible for our tendency to imitate others gestures such as yawning and keep us in sync with other people’s movements helping us to build rapport, empathy and cooperation. Mirror neurons are found in the right parietal operculum of the brain and fall into the category motor neuron meaning they control muscles and how your body moves.

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Mixed signals: When nonverbal signals are not of the same type. Signals can be honest and show deception or happiness with signals of sadness mixed in. In these cases, we usually rely on the negative cues as being more honest.

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Moaning: A low songlike musical note or grunt-like sound emitted over a prolonged period of time in repetitive sequence. It can indicate pain, discomfort or displeasure, but also happiness, pleasure and ecstasy.

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Mock fighting or play-fight: Physical wrestling that occurs between friends or family, usually children, or between father and son where the aim is to test strength without injury. Mock fighting is an evolutionary throwaway gesture which would have prepared people for real fighting and war in adulthood.

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Moistening lips: When done by women in courtship indicates sexual interest. Lips are said to imitate the female labia and licking them draws attention by both making them shinny and also by movement – of the tongue.

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Moral looking time: The appropriate eye contact that doesn’t violate someone’s privacy.

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Morris, Desmond, J.: Born 1928, Morris is a British zoologist and ethologist who was made famous by his book “The naked ape” in 1967 which examined humans from an unbiased scientific perspective by discussing them in the same respect as other animals. His contention is that humans are no different than animals and carry with them many prehistoric hunter-gatherer features just as all animals do. His publications have attracted much attention. His focus on humans as animals has done a lot for the study of nonverbal behaviour because it enables researchers to boil down gestures and postures to root causes through evolution. He has also published books such as “Manwatching” later reprinted at “Peoplewatching”, “Gestures: Their origin and distribution”, and “Babywatching” among many others.

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Mouth guard (the): A gesture done by raising the hand to the cheek, or side of the mouth, or by wrapping a finger around the upper lip. Sometimes the hand does a downward swipe with the mouth, the hand is made into a fist and rested against the mouth, or it seems as if the person is talking through their hand. It is an indication of timidity and sometimes linked to dishonesty and low self esteem.

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Movement or motion: Relative movement is an area that is frequently overlooked, but one that is nearly ubiquitous and meaningful. Movement as a nonverbal creates various means such as power, dominance, submission, threat, intimacy, and so forth. Movement can also serve to draw attention and lack thereof signals a desire to blend into the surroundings to go unnoticed. Moving closer to someone signals intimacy and threat, whereas moving away signals dislike and lack of threat.

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Moving toward or shrinking distances: When a person closes the gap between another person it signals interest, commonality, liking, intimacy or affection, a desire to hear more clearly or to show ownership.

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Mumbling: A voice trait where syllables are often jumbled together or inaudible due to low voice volume. Mumbling can be due to distraction, tiredness, chewing food, inebriation. More negative meanings of mumbling includes a lack of self confidence, insecurity, anxiety, inability to articulate thoughts, self-consciousness, preoccupation, fatigue or illness. A mumbler seldom seeks or is able to take leadership roles and are often judged to be depressed or sad. They also habitually use less gestures and appear less animated and less upbeat, have limp bodies, passive motions and tired demeanor.

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Mutual gaze: Happens when two people look each other’s faces which often includes bouts of direct eye-to-eye-gaze.

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If you are only picking up on what is being said, you are missing more than half of the message.

For more information on BodyLanguage be sure to check out: BodyLanguageProject.com and the Ebook – The Body Language Guide to Dating, Attraction and Sexual Body Language.

Share and Enjoy:

Non Verbal Body Language Dictionary ::K::

by Christopher Philip • March 24, 2010 • 0 Comments

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King Arthur’s round table: As an aim to equalize authority amongst his knights, King Arthur swapped a conventional rectangular table round table for a round table. His efforts had another unforeseen effect. Instead of equalizing all members, power trickled-down from his left and right such that those closer held the greatest amount of power until the furthest person away faced him head on in a competitive arrangement.

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Kinesics: The interpretation of body language including facial expressions, gestures and postures, with direct respect to its movement. The term was first used in 1952 by anthropologist Ray Birdwhistell.

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Kinesthetic learners or kinesthetic communicators: Represent 40% of the population and are those who prefer to learn by touch rather then by simply watching. They prefer to jump right in. Kinesthetic learners can be restless or hyperactive when under-stimulated physically. These types of learner will prefer dioramas, physical models, role-playing, or reenactments. Kinesthetic communicators use phrases such as: This feel right. Can you grasp the concept? Have you lost your motivation? Let’s touch on this subject. Here’s a rough draft. Get a grip on yourself. I think things went smoothly. Let’s let him/her cool off. Can you feel the excitement? This decision carries a lot of weight.

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Kino anchored motion inducement (KAMI): A term used in pick-up and the PUA community whereby touch is used to help lead women where a man wishes to move her. KAMI includes guiding women by their lower back, touching the upper arm to indicate where he would like her to stand, pushing lightly on the upper hip to have her sit, or by wrapping the hand around the wrist to lock the woman’s hand to the man’s. KAMI is not forceful, but rather a light leading and relies on the interpretation of the muscular reflexes of the women causing her to take the path or least resistance.

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Kino escalation: A term used to describe the use of touch from first touch to sex. The word escalation refers to the sequential progression from accidental touching straight up to full blow permitted sexual touching. The touch sequence begins first by touching nonsexual areas such as elbows, hands or shoulders or through playful pushes, high fives and up to the torso, legs, face and hair, and eventually to kissing, and so forth.

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Kino pinging: A term used by pick-up artists meant to describe light and brief casual touching, to whoever is around them (men and women) in a non-threatening, nonsexual manner as a prelude to possible kino escalation.

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Kino steps: A specific formula used by pick-up artists of which touch is sequentially dictated in order to yield a specific result. It is a way to simplify and code a kino escalation routine of various forms. For example, the “high five and spin her around” routine follows from a) initiate conversation b) touching her briefly c) requesting to hold her hand d) lifting her hand across her body, lift and spinning her around, followed lastly by e) exit from her company to create importance or social proof through absence i.e. having better things to do.

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Kino test: A pick-up artist term that describes the willingness of a woman to comply with increased touching or kino escalation. It is usually as simple as initiating touch, then waiting for it to be reciprocated.

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Kiss hello or welcome/departure kiss: A greeting or departure gesture done by direct kiss to the cheek or the air next to the cheek or sometimes by pressing cheek to cheek and making a kissing sound. Sometimes it involves just one kiss and others it is done up to three times from one side to the other.

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Kissing: A display of affection done by pressing the lips of one person against that of another’s. Kissing can be closed mouth, a “peck”, or open, “French kiss” or done mouth to cheek or even mouth kissing the air next to the cheek – a common greeting gesture. The open mouth kiss is an intimate form of kissing reserved for romantic couples whereas cheek kissing is used between family members such as a mother or father and their children.

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Knee knee leg cross or knee-knee cross: This is an informal and common sitting posture where the leg rests over the knee of the other leg. Women with short skirts will be found to reveal thigh in this posture. Men in formal situations will adopt this sitting posture, but it’s not as common as the ankle over knee sitting position (the figure-four).

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Kowtow position: A submissive posture that includes bending the torso forward at the waist. It stems from the Chinese bow serving to show respect for higher ranking individuals.

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If you are only picking up on what is being said, you are missing more than half of the message.

For more information on BodyLanguage be sure to check out: BodyLanguageProject.com and the Ebook – The Body Language Guide to Dating, Attraction and Sexual Body Language.

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Non Verbal Body Language Dictionary ::I::

by Christopher Philip • March 24, 2010 • 0 Comments

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Idiosyncratic body language: Individual nonverbal cues that are person specific that are built into their character which are repeated as specific stimuli or emotions resurface. They provide the body language reader with reliable cues to underlying meaning in a particular person, but not necessarily any other.

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Illustrators: Gestures that we use while speaking that are directly linked to words. We use these gestures in cooperation with the verbal language to help emphases meaning. Examples of this is the motion of throwing whilst speaking of tossing a ball or using a punching motion to emphasize what happened during a fight, or by describing something, as in, “It was this wide”, then spreading the hands apart to show just how wide it was.

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Impatience: Nonverbal signals that indicate a desire to move to a task that includes fidgeting movements such as drumming the fingers, rocking from side to side, bouncing a leg or foot, slapping the thigh with the hand. These gestures are substitutes to the actual task a person wishes to perform.

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Impression management: The desire, motivation and knowledge to control, either consciously or subconsciously how one is perceived by others through the conveyance of information. It includes acting strong, submissive or muted when required, as exhibited through nonverbal means.

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Inbau, Fred E.: Born 1909, deceased 1998 Fred Inbau was a Professor of Law. In 1945 he joined the faculty of Northwestern University School of Law and later headed the Criminal Law department. As his career developed he became more and more fascinated with police interrogation and worked closely with police officers in their training. He wrote a very popular and influential book by the title “Criminal Interrogation and Confessions” as well as “Reid nine steps” which details various techniques useful in interrogating suspects.

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Inclusion and exclusion technique: Standing or sitting positions that either include or exclude others from conversations based on orientation. It is usually meant to describe a three person affair that have formed a triangle, but inclusion and exclusion can happen with just two people also based on orientation alone. When a third person arrives, the technique to exclude involves an orientation where the original two remain facing each other or, if not facing head-on will close the angle between them even further (from a ninety degree angle to zero, or head-on). This shows that the third person is not accepted. Usually only the head will turn toward the person who is not included. Therefore to exclude someone, the technique says that shoulders or torsos face away from the excluded and toward the included.

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Incomplete arm crossing or incomplete crossed arms: Where one arm crossed over the body to clasp the other arm or elbow. This posture represents a desire to create safety as one would have experienced when a parent held the arm.

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Incomplete gestures: Gestures such as half shrugs or partial smiles. These indicate that a person lacks true commitment to what is being said.

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Incongruent: A state or cluster of cues which are not consistent and when they come together formulate a mixed or confusing message. This state often happens in those who are trying to hide their true feelings. An example includes open postures with palms up, which is honest, but then return their hands to their pockets as if they are hiding something. At times, incongruent body language is legitimate including simply being unsure of a position. Incongruent body language is perceived in a negative light by others who are aware of it.

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Indecision or indecisive body language: Found in people caught between two or more options. Nonverbal cues of indecision include shifting back and forth in a chair, looking back and forth between objects, tilting the head from one side to the other, opening and closing the hands and opening and closing the mouth without saying anything.

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Independent and opposite position: A seating arrangement where two people face head-to-head across the table, but not directly – rather they are adjacent. We see this when people sit in busy places with other strangers or wish to work by themselves.

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Indicators of disinterest (IOD): Nonverbal cues or signals put out by men and women that show they aren’t interested in an interaction. They can occur in a dating context, business context, or any social context. Turning torsos away, crossing arms, avoiding eye contact, looking away, drumming the fingers in boredom, or picking imaginary lint are all body language cues showing a lack of interest.

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Indicators of sexual disinterest (IOsD): Nonverbal cues or signals put out by men and women that show they aren’t interested in a sexual relationship or interaction.

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Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI): Nonverbal cues or signals put out by men and women that show they are interested in a sexual relationship or interaction.

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Inebriation body language or drug use or alcohol use: Signals imparted by people who have been exposed acutely or chronically to various types of drugs. These include slurred speech, rapid speech, exaggerated behaviours such as loud talking, becoming to close or talking too quietly, red eyes, squinting eyes, glazed eyes, bags under the eyes, mood swings, loss of inhibition, shaking, red nose, odor, inconsistent behaviour, poor hygiene and a withdrawal from normal routines.

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Influential body language: Using body language to change opinions, create sales, build relationships that previously didn’t exist, display various strong attributes and reinforce messages while speaking as well as other constructive uses. This differs from manipulative body language since it does not induce someone into decisions that are damaging.

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Informal meeting environments: Locations where people come together to talk about business or to casually chat as friends. This type of setting includes round tables, sofas, coffee shops or park benches. They lack stuffiness and are therefore informal. These types of environments invite friendship, trust and openness and can serve to build rapport quickly.

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Inner self: That which influences of all nonverbal communication to produce the character that is seen by others. It is that part of the self that consistently and routinely controls body language patterns of which is nearly impossible to consciously control. The inner self is the aspect one is required to change in order to change nonverbal patterns to portray traits that are more desirable.

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Intensity: A measure of the amount of emphasis placed in a nonverbal message. It is a term that describes the amplitude to which, for example, the arms and legs reach and the strength of a smile or frown. It is an indication to the dept of the emotion that is felt and its accuracy to what is really felt.

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Intention movements, intention postures or intention cues: A position that indicates what someone wishes to do. Pointing toes toward or away, leaning or looking away and hands on legs in sprinter position are all intention movements since they tell where one wishes to go. Intention cues can also outline a gesture that a person wishes to do, but is otherwise holding themselves back from doing. For example, when children play-fight, they may gap their mouth in a play face signaling intention biting and at other times even follow through when brought to full anger. As adults shaking a fist or vigorously pointing a finger at someone is an intention to strike or spear a person.

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Interlacing fingers or interlocking fingers: Happens by locking the fingers together and rubbing them one inside the other as a means of pacifying. It indicates high stress and low confidence.

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Interlocking feet or interlocking legs: Where the legs are crossed at the ankles while sitting or standing. Usually indicates a hidden thought or emotion, but can also signify high comfort or a desire to stick around especially when standing. When sitting, it can be done by wrapping the legs around a chair showing anxiety, concern or discomfort.

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Internal radar: A filter that when triggered accepts or rejects people. For example men have an internal radar that accepts women’s hip to waist ratio to be seventy percent whereas women’s radar on the same characteristic is set to ninety percent. Women also have internal radars for height, income and intelligence whereas men have internal radar for large breasts, long legs and blonde hair. Internal radar is not just set for sexual cues, it spans all facets of life.

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Interpersonal distance: Refers to the ways in which people treat the space, or lack thereof between them and how they repel or are attracted to one another.

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Interpersonal communication: Refers to the ways in which people convey information to one another including through verbal and nonverbal channels.

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Interpersonal relationships: Refers to the social associations, connections or affiliations between two or more people.

Introverts: People that become easily affected from outside stimuli and seek refuge in quieter places. These types of people tend to freeze up more in public, but are loose when in their own element.

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Interrogators: Experts such as the FBI, CIA, military personnel, police and psychologists who specialize in interviewing suspects in order to reveal criminality versus innocence or to extract information by reading hidden messages in body language. They often focus on lying and lie detection and have been shown through research to be more effective at uncovering liars from truth tellers when compared to regular people. The goal of interrogators is to avoid false confessions by comparing the relaxed baseline of an individual against stimuli that creates stress to uncover leads for further investigation.

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Interruptions in speech: When a person cuts off another person mid-sentence. Sometimes this is due to good reason such as adding to the conversation or excitement, and other times is due to a desire to impatience, boredom, desire to control the topic or be persuasive or attention seeking.

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Intimate gaze or triangular gaze pattern: The eyes will travel continuously in a pattern from eye to eye then down to the mouth. They will also wander briefly to other parts of the face although the vast majority of time is spent looking at the eyes and mouth. When the eyes make forays to the rest of the body, they check out the clothing, overall build, jewelry and rings. The intimate gaze lasts around 4-5 seconds.

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Intimate space zone: A distance of 18 inches or closer which is reserved for only very close friends or romantic partners.

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Intimate touching: Touching aimed at creating or maintaining sexual connections including kissing, holding hands, rubbing the shoulders, touching intimate areas including the breasts and groin, etc.

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Intuition: Intuition includes the processing of information that we’ve obtained by observing people. When someone says they have a “bad” feeling about someone or they feel “uneasy” or the salesman was “slimy” they are using their intuition. Sometimes though, our intuition becomes clouded by preconceived notions and new information is tainted or distorted.

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Invisible lint picker (the): Shows a critical listener and indicates that what was being said is disliked, contempt and disapproval through eye contact avoidance and distraction.

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Inward lip roll: A similar meaning to compressed lips which is due to frustration and withholding of information or feelings. It is akin to bottling in the pressure and keeping everything inside. Sometimes the lip roll is due to intense concentration, but usually it is due to indecisiveness, nervousness and deception.

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If you are only picking up on what is being said, you are missing more than half of the message.

For more information on BodyLanguage be sure to check out: BodyLanguageProject.com and the Ebook – The Body Language Guide to Dating, Attraction and Sexual Body Language.

Share and Enjoy:

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